The International House of Bacon

…in which I ramble on for much longer than necessary regarding my opinions on R.E.M. songs and albums that only three or four people will care about.

R.E.M.’s still my favorite band after all these years. Yeah, Reveal was kind of crappy, but I liked Around the Sun, Up remains a top five album all time for me, and you really can’t go wrong with about 95% of the Bill Berry-era output. Sirius Radio is doing an all-R.E.M. station all week, which lent itself to forming this post over the last few weeks. Channeling my inner Rob Gordon…

My Top Five R.E.M. non-album tracks (as inspired by Sirius playing “Revolution” this evening)

5) “Tricycle“: A short instrumental from the “E-Bow the Letter” single that always gets stuck in my head, and it’s just a weird surf rock thing that…yeah. I can’t possibly explain my love for this song. How versatile is it? The video I linked uses the instrumental in this mashup, and I’d think we can all think of our own songs we’ve sang over it if we’ve heard “Tricycle” before.

4) “It’s a Free World, Baby“: A lot of people are REALLY into this song, and I think Peter Buck even said that he would have rather this song on Out of Time, and I can’t say I dislike it in the least. It’s an odd song, by any stretch, but it’s got a great chorus and fun harmonies, and sometimes that’s all you can ask for. Enjoy the armadillo montage with the video I linked to.

3) “Bad Day“: Cheating? Maybe, but I’m referring not to the finished product we recieved in 2003 but the old, unfinished, soon-to-be-a-map-to-”The End of the World” version that’s most definitely incomplete and maybe considered by some to be unlistenable, but still really energetic and all over the place in a way that we simply never, ever got to see the band at again. I can never, ever conceptualize R.E.M. allowing themselves to put such an unfinished piece to tape today, and that nostalgia alone ranks this song high for me. The video link is for the 1986 demo version.

2) “The Great Beyond“: This song was their second song about Andy Kaufman, written for Man in the Moon, a movie named after the first song. This song came around for me at a point where I’d sit upstairs at Anna Maria in the music building’s computer terminal and listen to the streaming version over and over and over. I absolutely loved it. The song is awesome especially for the last run through of the chorus, where you can hear a soft voice in the background singing the lead-in to the chorus of “Man on the Moon” (”Here’s a little agit for the neverbeliever/here’s a little ghost for the offering”). It’s likely a musical homage to Kaufman himself, I’ve never heard it mentioned anywhere, but it was one of those things that caught me completely off-guard when I first heard it and still gives me chills every time.

1) “Revolution“: A song that somehow got left off of Monster for reasons completely unknown, ended up on the soundtrack for Batman and Robin for equally unknown reasons, and has largely been relegated to an odd corner of R.E.M. history. It’s a good song, political as always, great chorus, a little noisy and crunchy, and it’s just really great. It’s up there with some of their best rock work during the Warner years, and one has to wonder whether it would have done well as a single off of New Adventures in Hi-Fi rather than the alternatives.

My Top Five R.E.M. cover songs (as inspired by Sirius playing “Draggin’ The Line” this morning)

5) “Draggin’ the Line“: Sometimes, the best cover songs are the ones where you know the people singing them are simply not taking the exercise seriously. Originally by Tommy James & The Shondells, the song ended up on one of the Austin Powers soundtracks, and is goofy with the horns and the harmonies in the chorus. It’s just too much fun.

4) “Superman“: I wasn’t aware this was a cover until much, much later. Leave it to R.E.M. to cover something this obscure, but hey. The selling point is the lead vocal of Mike Mills, and the fact that it’s really a weird song if you really put it all together.

3) “Love is All Around“: Pathetically, my first exposure to this song was by a band called Wet Wet Wet, and the R.E.M. version takes it about as seriously as the song needs to be taken. A cute pop song, for sure, but yeah. It is what it is.

2) “Wall of Death“: A Linda and Richard Thompson song which is literally about a carnival but more than likely is about something much deeper that I just don’t understand. Never mind that - it’s a really great song nonetheless, and I’d never heard the original (linked) until writing this, and it’s pretty faithful. Even being faithful, though, it could pass as an R.E.M. song without much of a problem. Another New Adventures-era b-side, which may have been one of the better times for post-IRS b-sides.

1) “First We Take Manhattan“: I still hold that more people are Leonard Cohen fans than they know, and this is one of those Leonard Cohen songs that is horribly, horribly dated, but still somehow awesome. The R.E.M. version gets a little angrier and sounds a little less of its time, which hurts the Cohen version a bit. A song that at least comes across as a bit angry and aggressive needs that oomph behind it, and the R.E.M. version really gets in that place.

My Top Five R.E.M. songs I’ve either heard live or would like to hear live (as inspired by the live version of “So Fast, So Numb” on the ride home)

5) “These Days“: The single best R.E.M. show I saw was in October of 2003, second row, where the show’s setlist started with “Begin the Begin,” leading to “So Fast, So Numb,” and then this, “These Days.” A rollicking song anyway, it gets crazy live, and it’s one of four late-era IRS songs (along with “Begin the Begin,” “Life and How to Live It” and “Shaking Through”) that really need to be done live to do them justice. Awesome, awesome stuff.

4) “The Apologist“: For all the issues with Up, the most interesting thing about the album is how the songs translated live. While “Daysleeper” and “Lotus” gave the impression of full-band sound, most of the rest were synthesized and had drum machines, making the live versions radically different in many cases. “The Apologist” has become a bit of a staple, along with “Walk Unafraid,” for being great live, and it’s just that it moves quicker and adds a new dimension to a song that can use the extra weight and urgency behind it.

3) “Auctioneer“: This is the only song left in R.E.M.’s catalog that I have not heard live but would really, really like to. An interesting song anyway, and as the video shows, was interesting live back in the mid-1980s when it was a new song. Apparently, it’s been on the recent setlists…

2) “Begin the Begin“: That they don’t open every show they do with this song is possibly a crime. Just sayin’.

1) “Country Feedback“: A cop-out? Possibly, but tell me R.E.M. has a better live song at this point. Not only is it the best song they do live these days, but it’s a song that simply cannot be replicated - it never ends well. The added benefit is that the album version on Out of Time is amazingly forgettable, making the live versions the more definitive ones of the set. The first time I saw this live, I got chills. Still do.

My Top Five R.E.M. music videos (as inspired by hearing two songs off Monster today, neither of which being songs I necessarily wanted to hear off Monster)

5) “Pop Song 89“: The problem with this is that the YouTube version doesn’t do this video justice - the topless ladies in this video aren’t the good part - the good part is the television edit where the boobies of both the ladies AND Stipe are covered up with a large black bar. A worthy statement if one ever heard one.

4) “Stand“: Oh, the dancing THE DANCING. It’s just corny enough to work, and is a worthy precursor to…

3) “Shiny Happy People“: …this. Yeah, I went there. There’s just so much that’s right about this video - Bill Berry completely being obnoxious about the whole thing, Peter Buck with his best effort at suppressing the murderous rampage he’s so clearly ready to go on, Kate Pierson being Kate Pierson. The song is pretty bad by R.E.M. standards, but come on, don’t tell me it doesn’t put a smile on your face.

2) “Bittersweet Me“: I’ve gained a new appreciation for this video recently. I got fooled back when it first came out, and even tried to find “Stanco e Nudo” to watch. It’s just a really neat concept that could have gone really horribly wrong and didn’t.

1) “Crush With Eyeliner“: I’ve always loved this video. It cracked me up the first time I saw it, and it may be the context of the time screaming at me - it just seemed completely bizarre and fun to see a band have a fake band play them in a video, and then make it look like the most stereotypical video of the time. Plus, the minor details - lead singer in a Monster-era cowboy hat, the guitarist still plays a Rickenbacker, it’s just a really great concept video for a really great song.

My Top FiveSix R.E.M. songs in general (as inspired by hearing “E-Bow the Letter” on the way in to work)

5a) “E-Bow the Letter“: This was the lead song from New Adventures in Hi-Fi and may have essentially sunk any chance of R.E.M. being a commercially viable band in the United States for the future up to this point. It’s a weird, almost stream-of-consciousness dirge that always stuck around with me, and it’s probably the most well-known song to feature an E-Bow, so that’s something, too.

5b) “Crush With Eyeliner“: Who cares if the song is about Courtney Love, or a transsexual, or if Courtney Love is a transsexual. It’s instrumentally awesome, glam-tastic, and there’s nothing to dislike about it. I’ve linked the band playing this on Letterman sometime in 1995 - easily the best live version I’ve heard.

4) “Life and How to Live It“: I can’t really describe this song well - it builds in an interesting way and has one of the better choruses that Stipe’s tossed out there, I think. It’s a really fun ride.

3) “Auctioneer“: As I said above, it’s an interesting song, and my favorite part is the harmony in the middle in the way it splits off. Fables of the Reconstruction… has a lot of the most interesting guitar parts by Peter Buck, as well, and this song is ultimately no different in that regard. That the band is unlikely to replicate anything this interesting again is somewhat disappointing to me.

2) “9-9“: Probably my favorite song from the early sessions anyway, but I couldn’t tell you what it is about this song that hooks me in differently than, say, “Boxcars” or “Wolves, Lower.” I think it’s probably the bass part.

1) “Disturbance at the Heron House“: Excuse the weird video. Anyhow, this is easily my favorite song by R.E.M. at this point - a harbinger of what would ultimately make them popular, perhaps, and maybe a little neater and cleaner than their previous singles (although, to my knowledge, this was never a single for whatever reason). Regardless, the song has always sat very well with me and it still one of the better songs they’ve put out there, in my mind.

My Top Five R.E.M. albums (as inspired by hearing “The Apologist” on the way to work)

5) Automatic for the People: The album is still somewhat jarring in the context of what came before and what came after, but it’s impossible not to fully embrace its beauty. My favorite song from it continues to be “Find the River,” but, outside of “Everybody Hurts,” every other song does a good job jockeying for that position. It’s hailed as a classic for a reason, after all.

4) New Adventures in Hi-Fi: It’s hard for me to connect the songs together, but the flow of the album forces it anyway. It’s more than a Monster retread, better than what “E-Bow” promised, and has a lot of really solid songs on it from start to finish.

3) Document: “Heron House,” “End of the World,” “Exhuming McCarthy,” “Welcome to the Occupation”…is there really a bad song on this album? Is there really a song on this album that you could point to and say that there’s no chance at all that it could have been at least a minor hit in some circles? Outside of Automatic for the People, I still think this is R.E.M.’s most cohesive album.

2) Murmur: Stick to your roots, I suppose. It sounds fairly amateur in light of even Lifes Rich Pageant, never mind the more polished Warner years. The influence this album has had on everything after it, though, from R.E.M. to everyone who listened to R.E.M., is what elevates this album beyond basic debut album categorization.

1) Up: It may not have all my favorite songs on it, or even have some of their best work, but in terms of what this album ultimately meant following the departure of Bill Berry and the need for the band to change or die, it never ceases to amaze me to this day. For some, this was the beginning of the end of the band, but my hope was that it would usher in a new, better band. In retrospect, that’s somewhat mixed, but we still got a great album out of Up in my mind.